[Designing flyers is so much fun!]

This is a show you shouldn't miss!!

[miss A, i'm slowly making you a celebrity in the G.]

"Keep the dream but never scream."

There has been a recurring theme in my dreams for the past ten years. It seems i am always trying to get away from something terrifying, but once i try to run it's as if my legs each way 200 lbs. and i can hardly push myself forward. Last night i was running from 2 ft. tall tarantulas with copper-colored legs and snowy white faces.
This morning i finally realized what i need to do:
stop trying to run, turn around, and face my opponent.
I need to battle my fears hand-to-hand.

"Countdown to a tight sound, and so it begins.."

3 hours until class is over.

3 days until the weekend.

4 days until Lauren and Elier's birthday hoopla on the party bus.

24 days until Graduation.

1 month until my birthday.

1 month plus a couple days until my trip to visit Chicago and the fantastic Miss A.

2 months and 9 days until i have to be moved out of Wafco.

1 video project left to shoot and edit.

1 series of photos to be edited and printed.

1 speech to prepare and deliver.

1 art history exam left.

2 sculptures left to complete.

I'm so close to being finished with my B.F.A.  5 years, 4 majors, and 2 universities later and i will officially be a college graduate.  It's thrilling and spooky simultaneously.

it's so close now.

spring break is so close  i can taste it. after 10 o'clock tomorrow morning, i will unwind. i will officially have nine consecutive opportunities to sleep in.  i will have to time to fill out internship applications.  i will [hopefully] finish [or at least make significant progress on] my website.  i will get the oil changed in my car. i will paint my toenails neon pink. i will get started printing for my independent study project. i will take a daytrip to the zoo. i will drink beer and eat blue eggs for breakfast.

i managed to make it out of town for 24 hours this past weekend.  it had been so long since i'd been away from the boro.  three months and one day to be exact.  faith and i took a brief excursion to raleigh to spend an absolutely lovely night at the Manor.  i had more fun touring a basement than should be allowed.  i drank too much, danced a little, and awoke to the sound of rain against second story windows.  

classes were cancelled monday.  it made me sad when i realized i could have stayed in raleigh for one more day, but that soon was replaced by the thrilled realization that i would not have to get myself covered in plaster until wednesday.

the rest of the week has come and gone like a dream does upon waking.  nothing significant, just bits and pieces of banalities drifting in a gaussian blur.  

i'll edit until my eyeballs bleed.

This video was completed last fall for my independent study.  It was created using only photographic stills shot on a Canon Rebel and edited together in Final Cut.

This is my most recent film.  It was my first time editing using my own video footage.

Shooting this project made me realize just how incredibly out of shape i am. 

i will always hold your hand.

"i was too drunk or too young. of that i can be sure."

Inspiration strikes.

i close my eyelids and watch a slideshow of brightly colored figurines amongst a chaotic pattern of branches, a girl running in a black bell hat and a yellow overcoat across train tracks in the dark, dizzying layers one atop another, a kidnapping of The Daisy Duke, christmas lights twinkling.

I've been teaching myself to control my anxieties- develop a of laissez-faire attitude.
I'm no longer getting angry about little things that ordinarily would drive me batty. like dishes piling in the sink, Mr. Kitty's howling fits, people walking too slowly in front of me in the hall, the sounds of coughing and sniffling, being kept awake by the sociopath upstairs blaring bad 90s hits, sunday drivers . .

i want my work to reflect this change.

not that i'll take on my projects with any less ambition or concern, but i'm moving towards more lighthearted subject matter. I want the characters i create to express the humor and absurdity we experience in our daily lives.

"Ageing Young Rebel"

i happily stumbled across this by sheer accident.
it's lovely.

"why do birds suddenly appear"

Day nine of the cold count.
still feeling miffed about not being able to spend the summer months in europe, although it means my impending escape from the G has been pushed forward.
[moths fluttering against the walls of my abdomen.]
my dreams have developed a feline face motif.
days pass while i sip stale coffee and smoke parliaments,
playing with dolls and cameras.
i chipped my milk glass ring.
today i received a sun-faded Sandman poster in exchange for a smile-
a smug grin plastered to my face the rest of the walk home.

"you are a yellow surprise."

"i just need a number and location."

one week of classes down . .
about thirteen more to go . .

and then i will finally have my B.F.A. in design.

i've been racking my brain trying to come up with what i want to do for my independent study this semester. I want to move past my typical black&whites and explore the incredible world of color. because i'm taking a video editing course i think i'm going to get more than my fill of final cut this semester, so i don't want to do another video for 499 as i had originally planned. The proposal is due wednesday, leaving me only two more days to come up with an innovative way to present color prints.
i have to give my first speech in my communication studies course tomorrow morning.
dinner with my dad tomorrow evening.
it's not even february and i'm already feeling the pressure.
is graduation really going to be enough motivation to keep on top of everything??
i guess it has to be.
graduation followed by moving back up north.
back to a place in which i can experience all four seasons of the year as my childhood convinced me they should be.
leaving the ball and chain of greensboro.
growing up.